I Need Your Photos

Hey, err'one.

This is a request, a plea if you will. It won't make much sense, but trust me-- there is a method to this madness.

I need an actual copy or a digital copy of you and your spouse or long-time significant other.

Like I said, this may not make sense to you. But I would appreciate it if you could spread the word. It could be any picture of the two of you-- a wedding picture, one of you when you were just dating, that one time when you looked at each other and thought "Why did I ever..."

Kidding!

But I would prefer any picture that you(s) feel best represents you and your love, your lives together.

I need these photos and digital files as soon as possible, however. And I am looking for as many as I can get. If you want to, throw in two or three of your favorite pictures.

I will make sure to take very good care of any actual photographs and they will be returned to you in the same condition as I received them.

Please, spread the word! We have a big family and it's not easy to get to everyone.

If you need to, leave the photos at Monica's House, Gramma Connie's House, or with Dolly. I will be able to pick up the photos at any one of these Hubs.

For digital copies, please send them to hernandez.sb@gmail.com (that should read, "h-e-r-n-a-n-d-e-z DOT s-b AT g-m-a-i-l DOT c-o-m").

Thank you all for your participation... cuz I know y'all will, right? ;)

Mind Tricks

Here's a few games I used to play with my employees at UPS. You see, they would tell me that they were looking at the address on every package. But yet, there were mistakes. So I would show them how their mind does things they may not be aware of-- which means that in every thing, at every time, in every situation, people have to pay attention and focus.

Maybe this can start your Monday on a good note....










Answers are posted in the comments. Click on 'Comments' at the bottom of this post to see the answers to these tricks.

New Pics of Fuzzy Cook

Y'all, here's the words from Louds (Laura) herself.

I would of never thought that I would get to see Mike changing diapers and burping a baby, much less his own!

So here are some new pictures of his pride and joy, Andrew "Fuzzy"
Cook-- yes daddy has already nicknamed him.

So there are new pics up in the Photo Album. And just in case you don't want to go there, here's something new for y'all... a slideshow.

Notice on Family Privacy

This is a note about privacy concerns. And it is the first and likely the last time I write something like this.

Videos of the family are recorded by me on my digital camera. I take the footage and edit it and make a video.

These videos are posted onto the website YouTube. YouTube is a very popular site. Millions of people have loaded millions of videos. Some are meant for friends and family, much like our videos. Other videos are informational-- UC Berkeley posts many videos so that students and the general public can find out about the university and learn from many educational videos they put on YouTube. Musicians and artists post music videos, interviews, concerts and similar videos meant for fans. Some people record TV shows, news shows, and political ads and put them up.

Just as people go to a bookstore and find all sorts of books and magazines, the same is true for YouTube.

Because the videos are typically viewable by the general public, some people might not be comfortable with having our family videos on YouTube-- whatever is in the video can be seen by anyone. Mostly this discomfort is from not being comfortable with the internet and technology itself.

IF YOU ARE CONCERNED ABOUT ANYTHING IN THIS BLOG, IN THE PICTURES, OR IN THE VIDEOS, LET ME KNOW AND I WILL REMOVE THE CONTENT.

Though the videos are viewable by anyone, there is no other information attached to the videos. Someone watching the video would not be able to see anyone's name, address, phone number, hometown, or any other bit of personal information. They would only know what is in the video and nothing more.

Stalkers would not be able to find you from these videos. I am careful to not include personal information in them. Stalkers do not go online to become stalkers-- they are stalkers anyway.

The only way I can put this:

Don't flatter yourself into thinking someone wants you that badly.

News reports of internet stalkers are because of people who put personally identifiable information online so that the stalkers can find them.

You are more likely to become a victim of a stalker on the street and from someone you know or have dated than from an online stalker.

Your child is more likely to be abused or kidnapped by a family member or family friend than by a stranger.

Predators of children on the internet go after kids who communicate with the predator.

Stupid and irresponsible kids talk to strangers in the internet and become victims.

Stupid and irresponsible parents that don't communicate with their kids or know who their kids are talking to online have kids who become victims.

A YouTube video does not lead to stalkers, predators, or any other person you might fear.

This blog and the pictures in it can be viewed by the general public.

If you are concerned about YouTube videos, than your concerns are probably the same for this blog and the pictures in it.

There is no other way to have this blog, the videos, or the pictures online and to keep them private and only viewable to our family.

I have placed all of the family videos on YouTube and have marked each of them as private. No one else may see the videos on YouTube except me. The only other place to view the content is here on the family blog.

Here's a way you might be able to understand what I'm saying. Fear is most often irrational. People are afraid of things they should not be afraid of, and don't care about things they should fear.

No school bus had seatbelts. Every passenger car has seatbelts. Parents raise an uproar of anger and disbelief when they learn this. But here's the truth: your child is more likely to die in your car with you behind the wheel than on any school bus without seatbelts. A school bus is big and yellow, and cars notice it and stay away. A bus driver's only job is to drive safely. Meanwhile, parents speed through freeways and the city, talk on the cell phone, weave in and out of traffic, yell at the kids to stop talking, worry about getting to work on time, worry about what they have to do later, worry about the kids' homework, drive through yellow lights... Parents are distracted and refuse to abide by the law and by rules of safe driving.

I respect anyone's concerns. But I have no tolerance, one way or the other, for people who fear things they shouldn't and have no fear for things they should.

• --2,000-3,000 people die every year from workplace accidents, and even though everyone works, we are more afraid of terrorism-- terrorism that has only killed 3,000 civilian Americans in the last 100 years.

• --New York has twice been the victim of terrorism since 1990, but people in Iowa, Nebraska, Mississippi, Oregon and small towns like Santa Barbara are more afraid of being victims of terrorism themselves.

• --Syphilis, Chlamydia, Gonorrhea, and other STD infection rates are on the rise, and yet we know people who continue to have unprotected sex-- because they think pregnancy is the only thing to fear.

• --Heart Disease is #1, Cancer is #2, Stroke is #3, and Diabetes is #6 on the list of the leading causes of death in the United States. And how many of us are over weight? How many of us smoke? How many of us exercise regularly? How many of us take vitamins? How many of us drink more than we should? How many of us go to the doctor regularly? How many of us sleep enough each night? How many of us put up with bad situations and abusive relationships at work and at home?

• And yet, we teach our kids more about being afraid of 'the scary man' than we do about all of these other things that can kill them.

What do we fear and why do we fear it? Why are we afraid of things that never happen to us when we should fear those things that happen to everyone around us?

If you are concerned about stalkers and predators, I will gladly take down the content here.

But at least be consistent with fear and show me you are concerned about things that will really affect you.

Third Saturday: January Edition

Ronny, Danny, lil David, Robert, Louie, Eric, and I showed up this time.

Ronny and Danny showed up at 9:45. They had to leave early because Danny had an appointment with a stylist. Danny’s got nice hair, so no barber could do it up right.

Robert and I were there about 10 sharp. Marina dropped off lil David about 5 minutes after. Louie showed up about 15 minutes later. Eric showed up 20 minutes after that. After the arrival times for Monica’s Birthday at Harry’s, I think this scientific study shows there’s truth to what we’ve said all along—call it earlier than you want it to happen, because people will be streaming in for a while.

After passing around the chisme, the funny stories about people we knew, and our own version of ‘The Big Idea’, we all left around 11:40 or so.

These breakfast gatherings are always good times, whether the groups are big or small. What’s nice is that people don’t feel like they have to go or like they are forced to go. Someone will always be there, and while breakfast alone gives you time to think, anyone else showing up helps make good conversation possible.

See y’all at the next Third Saturday breakfast (take a look at the calendar to find out when it is)—and hopefully sooner.

Birthday Appeal

Folks, I'ma level with you.... in a fun way.

As I said before, there are quite a few birth dates I do not have. I might have only two-thirds of all birthdays in our family on the calendar. There are more than 100 of us at last count (which may itself be off).

Take a look below. This is the spreadsheet I have been using to log the birthdays. Go over it and see if there are any birthdays missing, or if there are any incorrect dates. Between those of you who view The Herd semi-regularly, I'm sure most of the rest can be found.

January Birthdays, Updated Again

See what I mean.

Someday I hope to have all of the birthdays on the calendar. I think I'm up to about 60-70, which means there's only 30-40 more to go.

Here's the latest update:

• Abraham Fuentes (Joaquin's son), January 28

I'll update more as they come.

Uncle Larry Modlin Has Bypass Surgery

Uncle Larry Modlin had quadruple bypass surgery on January 7th. He is doing well, however, and should be home by now. Bypass surgery isn’t easy, and it isn’t fun, so wish him well.

Just in case you need it, here’s a refresher on bypass operations:

Coronary artery bypass surgery, also coronary artery bypass graft surgery, and colloquially heart bypass or bypass surgery is a surgical procedure performed to relieve angina and reduce the risk of death from coronary artery disease. Arteries or veins from elsewhere in the patient's body are grafted to the coronary arteries to bypass atherosclerotic narrowings and improve the blood supply to the coronary circulation supplying the myocardium (heart muscle). This surgery is usually performed with the heart stopped, necessitating the usage of cardiopulmonary bypass.

The terms single bypass, double bypass, triple bypass, quadruple bypass and quintuple bypass refer to the number of coronary arteries bypassed in the procedure.

A quadruple bypass means four vessels are bypassed.

A greater number of bypasses does not imply a person is "sicker," nor does a lesser number imply a person is "healthier."


Here’s the Wikipedia article in case you want to read up. And I’m sure Uncle Larry could tell you all about it. So could Joe Cook—with his quintuple (5), or was it sextuple (6), bypass a few years ago? Be careful mentioning SEX-tuple though, 'cuz he might get excited.

Get healthy, Uncle Larry, so you can come to Santa Barbara for another visit!

Alexiana's Moves

Of course you didn't think we took Monica to dinner without any entertainment, right?

After Harry's, we took her party to Gramma Connie's (woo!) for some cake from Jennine's Bakery (which is actually very good... thanks Robert and Renee!) and to watch Monica's year-old granddaughter Alexiana dance for us (woo again!).

Yup... we know how to party. Oakland's got nothing on us.

Here's a video of the entertainment, Alexiana and her moves...

Third Saturday Breakfast

Here's your reminder, Cousins.

THE THIRD SATURDAY BREAKFAST WILL BE HELD THIS SATURDAY, JANUARY 19 @ 10AM AT THE MESA CAFE

Just had to put that in all caps and bold to eliminate any confusion. Remember, we changed it to Saturday for a reason... *points around the room*

See you then and there!

Updated: Martin's Birthday Video

Hey, everyone.

I know the quality on Martin's birthday video was poor, and it was hard to hear or read comments. So I went back and upped the quality. It's now a lot better.

Here it is below, and I changed it in the original post as well.

Monica's Birthday at Harry's

Our family is always fun, there’s no doubt about that. Monica’s birthday dinner at Harry’s seemed to take that seriously, because everyone seemed to enjoy him/herself on Saturday night.

26 people showed up: Monica, Renee, Chris, Raquel, Ryan, Alexiana, Esther (Chris’ Mom), Henry (Chris’ Dad), Robert, Gramma Connie, Linda, Manuel, Carmen, Eric, Lil Eric, Mija, Lizzy, Cindy Cook, Martin, Ty, Marina, Dolly, Bill, Marisa, Michelle, and I.

Here’s a few pictures in the Photo Album.

For those who didn’t go, here’s a few notable quotes from that night:

• --Singapore Slings for Linda, Manuel and Robert. As Robert said, “In honor of my godmother, Mija.” If you haven’t heard that story, ask someone. I’m not gonna put it up here…

• --First people (Monica and I) got to Harry’s at 5pm sharp. Folks were streaming in for the next 35 minutes. But the last group didn’t get there until just after 6. Everyone was wearing a watch. Maybe they’re just for looks, ‘cuz we all know how to tell time, right?

• --Gramma Connie likes to talk. But more than that, she just wants to know what’s going on. She was seated in the middle of the long table, where tradition says important people should sit (the ‘head of the table’ is a weird American thing the means you only have 2 people to talk to instead of 5 as you would in the middle). Thing is, she couldn’t hear the conversations at either end of the table.

• She was kinda pissed. So Renee commiserated, “I know, Gramma [I feel your pain]! See what happens when you have 13 kids and try to go to dinner with 50 people?!” We need to get a table shaped like a donut and put Gramma in a swivel chair in the middle so she can swing around and be part of EVERY conversation.

• --Monica had 2 glasses of wine. Folks asked her if she had brought a designated driver. She thought for a second and said, “Well, I brought David, so…. Never mind. I guess not.” Salene mentioned this in a comment to the post titled ‘Harry’s It Is’ by saying I needed to get my license so my Aunties could have a good time and still get home safely. I’m still laughing.

• --Carmen wanted to pay her bill, and she was asking for the ticket. Someone answered, “Hold on. They’re passing it around.” And Carmen said with excitement, “Oh! What are they passing around?!” Trying to hold back laughter, Renee said, “A joint.” Dolly threw in, “A mirror and a straw.” We love our Aunties, don’t we, Cousins?

Guest Post: Cold Sweats at 3am, Part I

Uncle Martin sent in this account of part of his day with the Triplets (Victoria, David and Jessica Gladish). This is really good times. The entire account is his. On a side note, this is exactly what we're looking for-- when you want to tell a story or say something, just send it in and I'll put it up.

Thanks, Uncle Martin!


All I wanted to do was take my son and the Triplets out for an easy afternoon bike ride and show them the sailors all over town, the big ship offshore and to prove to David that some of the sailors did indeed carry guns. Little did I know, we were in for much more then I ever thought possible.

Even before we left Marina's neighborhood little Jessica informed me she was hungry. I ignored her for I was expecting that from her. Secondly, Victoria then informs me her friend Sierra had a sibling who had a penis and a vagina-- I ignored her too. Were these signs of what the rest of our day would be like? Probably. But like Grandpa Sal, I couldn't help but get a kick outta them anyways.

Deciding to hit the breakwater first we headed over there as the tide was good and high, and the waves were sending heaping sprays of water over the wall (soaking all who chose to venture out to the sandbar to watch the brave surfers take off on great looking waves coming oh so close to the wall and rocks). So as we started, we parked our bikes near the Harbor Patrol office and headed out on our walk.

Well, as the waves crashed at the wall the first thing David and Victoria did was to try and hit each and every spray of water they could manage to get under. I mean some were a good 15 -20 ft. high, soaking all who got caught under them. Well, these 2 runts tried and managed to get soaked chasing each and every one they could get under. My son Ty was a halfway type of guy, dodging some and hitting others.

While little Jessica appeared to be traumatized by the sight of water spraying up some 20 ft, thinking would be swept off the walkway. I assured her that with me protecting her it would not happen. Holding my hand the whole way she barely got a sprinkle on her.

Finally at the end of the breakwater, we made it to where the surfers were (which I wanted them to see, but the little shits were not interested). Ty, David and Vicky were intent on getting even more soaked then they already were.

While I screamed at Victoria to get off the wall she decided to sit on, I soon saw David attempting to stand on the damned wall, to which I informed him, “That will never happen,” and to get his little ass down, “NOW!”

Soaked as they were, we headed out even further out to almost the tip of the sandbar, where they were practically touching the passing boats cruising in and out of the harbor.

Almost at my wit’s end by now, I called for an end to this dangerous situation and brought them all back to where our bikes were. The first thing Victoria says is, "I'm cold." To which I responded, "Well what the hell did you expect? Now you will learn about the consequences of your actions. Now get on your bike and let's go (damn it!)."

And that was just the first part. I gotta go now, but the second and third parts will be available later this afternoon. You won't want to miss them so tune in later-- you won't be disappointed.

Bye…..damn it.


Martin said he may not finish with Parts II and III. I hope you enjoyed his Guest Post. Let's see if we can get more in here!

Welcome to the World, Little One

Here's the word, sent by Rosa Rodriguez, Laura's mom:

• Andrew Michael Cook
• January 07, 2008
• 3:15 p.m.
• 8 lbs 7ozs
• 20 1/2 inches long

According to the University of Michigan's Health Center, the average birth weight and length of a newborn in the US is 7 pounds, 5 ounces and 20 inches long. Yup, this one's on the bulkier side. Not for nothing, but who knew Papas would have such a big baby? Well, Laura did do the heavy lifting, so to speak.

All, give him a warm welcome. And take a look at the pictures provided by Rosa in the Photo Album, or just click here.

January Birthdays, Updated

I forgot to include Cousin Candy in the birthday list for January-- sorry!

Here's the updated list:

• Leah Hernandez, January 1

• Martin Hernandez (Sr), January 2
  

• Marisa Arellanes (Scoob!), January 2
  

• Monica Modlin, January 8
  

• Manuel 'Duke' Romero, January 15

• Cousin Candy Diaz, January 15
  

• Sonia Aspuria, January 19
  

• Natalie Hernandez, January 22

• Malaya Aspuria, January 29

• Salene Castaneda, January 30
  

• Bill Arellanes, January 31

As I've written before, if you have anything to say, or want to add birthdays to my short list, just let me know!

Harry's It Is!

If you take a look at what I wrote yesterday, you might notice that someone left a comment (click on '1 comment' at the bottom of yesterday's post and the comment will open up).

Looks like Monica has decided to go to Harry's!

But take a look at the comment anyway. He or she has some words for y'all..... funny words.

May or May Not....

Monica turns 54 today (woo!) and there have been some discussions on what to do. Oprah turns 54 today too but who knows what she'll be doing.

Well, here's the maybes:

Folks may or may not take Monica to dinner on Friday night. Monica says things have been busy, and since 54 isn't a big number, she could take it or leave it.

Take it! Take it! Take it!

They may or may not go to Jill's Place (Shalhoob's). Jill doesn't take reservations of groups more than 8, and there's about 12 people on the short list.

So, they may or may not go to Harry's, where the food is mediocre but the drinks are stiff.

What's that mean for everyone? Not a whole lot, but wish her happy birthday anyway!

Any Minute Now...

... if it hasn't happened already.

Last night, the doctor induced labor on Laura. Today is her due date, so I guess the doc wanted his guess to be right on.

I haven't heard anything since this morning, and she may have had the baby by now. As soon as I hear anything different, I will let y'all know.

For now, we wait with Papas and Laura.

January Birthdays

Apologies for being a few days late (Happy Birthday to Leah, Martin and Scoob!).

Here are the January Birthdays (quite a few, in fact... what were y'all doing every October? No holidays, no change of seasons.... )

• Leah Hernandez, January 1

• Martin Hernandez (Sr), January 2
  

• Marisa Arellanes (Scoob!), January 2
  

• Monica Modlin, January 8
  

• Manuel 'Duke' Romero, January 15

• Sonia Aspuria, January 19
  

• Natalie Hernandez, January 22

• Malaya Aspuria, January 29

• Salene Castaneda, January 30
  

• Bill Arellanes, January 31
  

One birthday for every Tuesday in the month, and there are 5 Tuesdays in January-- if y'all planned that, you're good... you're pretty damned good... ;)

Here's the Calendar. Wish 'em well, folks!

Martin's 50th

Uncle Martin-- You made it!

50 years around the sun, and all is well.

Here's a little video of the day's happenings. I wish the sound was better, but you should be able to figure out the dialogue. Enjoy!

2007

I wish I had something more like a retrospective to write about today. You know, one of those things where I could cover the happenings of the last year with some quotes, a few pictures, and some nice words to roll the last 360-some-odd days into a nice compact essay. Unfortunately, my memory isn't that good, and I don't have pictures to cover all that has happened in the last 12 months.

So what can I say about all things Hernandez in 2007?

I can say that we've had a roller coaster ride, and sometimes things have just been mundane and vanilla.

There have been things that have made some of us question our own mortality and the value we place on life-- and on living. We have had additions to the family, and one great subtraction. External forces have brought many of us closer, and changed minds on what we do for family and the significance of family in our lives. And, for some of us, we have exposed our vulnerable selves to everyone, daring anyone to take a shot at our true inner selves.

Without a doubt, 2007 has been a year of significance for our family, as a whole. Every year in a family as large as ours is guaranteed to give rise to conflict and resolution, to new beginnings and an end to old things. Significance isn't measured objectively. Nor should it be. What is highly important to one may not be important to another, but this in no way diminishes the impact of a person or an event on any individual. What I see in passing may be your crowning achievement, and the least anyone could do is to acknowledge how much that moment means to you.

Which is another reason why I have difficulty limiting this post to a few things that resonated with everyone. In truth, there are over 100 of us from Gramma Connie on down the line. To say that some events meant more to the family than others is unfair to everyone. In fact, each of you did something this past year that was great, said something powerful, lived a day more memorable than any other. That such things may have occurred purely within the confines of your own existence is irrelevant. What is important to each of us must be acknowledged by the rest of us-- if it matters to you, than it matters to me, if for no other reason than we are family.

So I hope you'll forgive me for not listing funny moments, important events, best pictures and notable days of 2007. Rather than highlight some of what was important to some of us, I'd rather tip my hat to each one of us, to say that every one mattered most. Everyone is somebody, everyone is significant, every day of this year was a day to remember.

So give yourselves, and each other, a round of applause for helping make 2007 a year to remember.


Now, if you please, I'm sure we could all agree to the meaning behind the video below. A reminder to all of us to make sure we cherish every day, every moment, and remind those around us how much they mean to us.

Ladies and gentlemen, if you'll permit me, here is the song of our year...

Christmas Day

I wish I had more to write about. Truth is, I was only at Gramma's house for all of 40 minutes on Tuesday.

From what I could see, all is well. And you can't complain about that!

It was actually fairly low-key. Papas even commented on how the family's parties seem to be more mellow, and Ronny agreed, saying we're older and more calm than we used to be.

So be it. There ain't nothing wrong with mellow!

So here's to calm and quiet, older and wiser, refusing to sweat the small stuff.

Happy Holidays, y'all!

New Posts

Apologies to everyone.

On Monday I tweaked my neck at the gym. On Wednesday, after seeing noted local chiropractor Kevin Fisher, the deep tissue work and resulting release of toxins through me into flu-like symptoms over the last two days.

Thus I haven't had time to check for news or think of new posts to put up for the fam.

Hopefully this won't last, and I hope to see y'all on Tuesday.

Merry Christmas!

Revisited: Guest Commentaries

Back in August I made an appeal to any family members who have wanted to write about things can do so.

Four months later, and it hasn't happened but a couple times.

Seriously, it's not easy to try to come up with new material. Any time y'all want to write something, just let me know. Any time y'all want me to write about something, just let me know. Any time.... any time!

Here's what I wrote back in August:


Last week we started a regular item on The Herd. Every Tuesday we'll be highlighting someone in the family who has a business, is self-employed, someone engaging in a new business or financial endeavor. Well, I'd also like to open things up for another regular thing.

If anyone has something to say, something to write about, something they want to communicate to the family-- go right ahead. Let me know, and I will post whatever you want. The guest commentaries will be open to anyone, and on just about any topic.

I know some of us can type something up and send it in an email. Others, however, don't have the skills or the equipment. That's fine-- get a hold of me and I can type what you say, or you can have someone else do it.

I hope to have some regular input from others in the family. I know some of us have things on our minds, and some of us like to talk...

::cough:: Uncle Vic ::cough::

...so I know we can put some Guest Commentaries up soon and often.

Shout shout let it all out...

Happy writing, y'all.

Coming Due

Laura and Papas' baby is almost here!

Hard to believe, but it's already been more than 3-and-a-half months since the news made it out to everyone, and on the Herd.

Laura is due on January 7-- all of 24 days away.

I'll post some pictures if I get any so we'll all be able to see the latest addition to our fam.